#this is cranked my dude

[dysfunctional-doodle]

i got bored so… two many turtles chapters 1 and 2 but i translated it badly! (mostly grammar and tense issues (and a bit of a struggle with making up chat and usernames)

Za Dużo Żółwi

1: Zaczynamy Chaos

>>Wojojo Żółwie Ninini <<

~MagicznyMikey~:

to był tylko mały pożar nie wiem czemu panikujesz kolo

no wiesz

taki malutki ogień!!

~~Elektro~~:

jako inny mikey współczuję

Czerwień:

Wszyscy jesteście okropnym przykładem

Mikey to był duży pożar??!!!

~MagicznyMikey~:

hhhnnngg nie

Bootyyyshaker9000:

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: Większą część kamery zajmuje płonące złomowisko. W tle widać Leo, który bierze sobie selfie, i Mikey, który rzuca więcej śmieci do ognia. Mikey jest trochę zamazany, jego uśmiech bardziej dziki w świetle ognia. W zdjęciu nie ma Rapha.]

Jestem taki dumny

Czerwień:

Ten pożar był o wiele mniejszy jak tam byłem

Powiedziałeś mi że wypuszczasz???

MaMózg:

Nie wiem czemu myślałeś że Mikey zrobi co mu kazałeś, w jakimkolwiek wszechświecie.

Ale nie spodziewałem się że Leo dołączy.

ZjadłbyMózg:

a to ma być pożar?

Tchórz

Czerwień:

Błagam cię nie zachęcaj ich

Bootyyyshaker9000:

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: ten sam obraz co wcześniej, tylko że tym razem, ogony maski Leo płoną. Leo jeszcze nie zauważył, i pozuje dla kamery.]

Mam mu powiedzieć

ChceMózg:

Tak????!!!!

~~Elektro~~:

nie

zrób wideo

proszę

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Co możesz mi zaoferować @~~Elektro~~

Mądrala:

Nic nie powiedz, chcę zobaczyć co się stanie.

Dla nauki.

KapitanLeo:

Ratuj go???

Kurwa:

ugaś go jak umrze

~~Elektro~~:

@Bootyyyshaker9000 discord nitro może?

Czerwień:

DONNIE

ChcęMózg:

Boga się nie boicie

Kurwa:

bóg nie istnieje, zabiłem go

~~Elektro~~:

nie prawda

ja jestem bogiem

~MagicMikey~:

ja też jestem bogiem

ChcęMózg:

Zabij mnie

MaMózg:

Jak właściciel mózgu poproszę cię, żebyś nie pozwolił mu spalić się na śmierć @Bootyyyshaker9000

No bo wiesz

To nie byłoby miłe

Kurwa:

tchórz

Mądrala:

Ten groupchat istnieje tylko kilka dni, a już nazwałeś wszystkich tchórzami

Czerwień:

DONNIE

MaMózg:

Wybacz, to moja wina.

Bawiłem się z bronią międzywymiarową która dostałem od tych małych chłopców i bum

Malutki naukowy przypadek

ZjadłbyMózg:

Nie jestem geniuszem ale nie powiedziałbym że tworzenie podróbkę discorda z naszymi klonami to nie malutki naukowy przypadek

MaMózg:

Nie kwestionuj nauki!

Mądrala:

Nie kwestionuj nauki!

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Nie kwestionuj nauki, śmiertelniku

ZjadłbyMózg:

Brakowało mi więcej nerdów w moim życiu

Mądrala:

@ZjadłbyMózg Żałujesz że zjadłeś swój mózg?

KapitanLeo:

Czy ktoś zgasił ten pożar?

ZjadłbyMózg:

@Mądrala Gdzie powiedziałem że to był mój mózg

~~Elektro~~:

czy smakowało

ChcęMózg:

Nawet nie będę się pytał

Czy Niebieski jest okej???

Bootyyyshaker9000:

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: Pożar szybko rośnie, Leo mruży oczy i spogląda na aparat w telefonie, gdy płomienie na jego masce rosną.]

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: To samo co wcześniej, tylko że teraz oczy od Lea są komicznie wielkie gdy zauważył jego płomienną maskę .]

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: Zamazany obraz Leo kręcącego się wokół, w połowie krzyku, gdy zdejmuje maskę. Mikey krzyczy w tle.]

Nareszcie zauważył.

~~Elektro~~:

@ChcęMózg piszesz jak stary dziadek iksde

HEJO PRZEŻYŁ

Kurwa:

Szkoda

KapitanLeo:

Czemu to szkoda że przeżył?

Mam się martwić??

Kurwa:

nie

po prostu go nie lubię

Czerwień:

Donnie lepiej uciekaj

~MagicznyMikey~:

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: Mikey z ramionami owiniętymi wokół Leo. Oboje uśmiechają się do kamery, oboje są wyraźnie opaleni, ale poza tym nic im nie jest. Leo nie ma ubranej maski, a w tle nadal widać ogień.]

Żyje!!

@Bootyyyshaker9000 o kurwa zmywaj stąd

Czerwień:

Nie ujdzie ci to na sucho

Wasza kara będzie tak d��uga, że w połowie będziecie martwi

Bootyyyclapper9000:

nie fair

prawie zginąłem a ty chcesz mnie ukarać??

MaMózg:

Nie ma o co się martwić, szansa twojej śmierci była mała!

Bootyyyclapper9000:

to nie pomogło

KapitanLeo:

No nie wiem, szlabany nie działają dla mnie i moimi braćmi

Normalnie i tak wychodzimy??

Kurwa:

Nie pochlebiaj sobie przychodzisz tylko bo cię zmuszamy

Nie jesteś fajny

Jak ja

~~Elektro~~:

*jak my

ChcęMózg:

No

Dla nas podobnie jest

Próbuje przez kilka dni ale gdy słyszę wszystkie plany które klują to nie mogę się powstrzymać

MaMózg:

A właśnie dla tego tylko chcesz mózg

~MagicznyMikey~:

Stary Leo dosłownie musi być zmuszony żeby złamać zasady

ChcęMózg:

Cisza

~~Elektro~~:

*szept* on nie jest bardzo zabawny, prawda?

ZjadłbyMózg:

spierdalaj @ChcęMózg

ChcęMózg:

Mam wyjąć sprej w butelce?

MaMózg:

Powiedziałeś że się tego pozbyłeś!!

Bootyclapper9000:

SPREJ W BUTELCE??!!?!!!! JAK JAKIŚ KOT????!!

Mądrala:

Sorki, ale wszechświętne granice to powstrzymują

ChcęMózg:

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: butelka która wygląda przynajmniej dziesięć lat stara, dekorowana brokatem i naklejkami. Dużymi, niestabilnymi literami widnieje na nim niebieski znacznik „SPRAJ DLA ZLYCH BRATAH”. Pismo wygląda jak dzieło małego dziecka.]

@MaMózg na prawdę to wierzyłeś?

Dalej go mam

No, dosłownie czuję się jak opiekuje się kotami z wścieklizną. Kiedy których z nich mnie denerwuje, psikam im tym sprejem

MaMózg:

Okrucieństwo

ChcęMózg:

Przywileje starszego brata

Czerwień:

Warto wypróbować

ZjadłbyMózg:

Nie mam wścieklizny

ChcęMózg:

Nie zgadzam się

Oprócz Mikey’a najbardziej przypominasz zdziczałego kota

KapitanLeo:

W takich chwilach życzę żebym miał takie coś!

~~Elektro~~:

*smutne żółwie dźwięki*

Bootyyyclapper9000:

NIE DAWAJ CZERWIENIU POMYSŁÓW @ChcęMózg

Mądrala:

Myślałem że lubicie wodę?

Przynajmniej ty, jesteś suwakiem, prawda?

Właściwie, jestem pewny że @WSZECHŚWIAT_03 lubią wodę? Jak to jest skuteczne?

Bootyyyclapper9000:

liczy się motyw

ZjadłbyMózg:

Nie jesteśmy kotami

Kocham wodę ale

MaMózg:

Powtarzam, okrucieństwo

~MagicznyMikey~:

@ChcęMózg raportuje cię do PETA

~~Elektro~~:

jesteś przejebany iksde iksde iksde

MaMózg:

Jako młodszym bratem, nie podobają mi się te przywileje starszego brata

~~Elektro~~:

^^

Mądrala:

^^

ZjadłbyMózg:

Zgadzam się

Bootyyyclapper9000:

^^

Donnie też się zgadza po prostu się chowa od czerwonego

~~MagicMikey~~:

**Amen**

Kurwa:

^^

ChcęMózg:

Znęcanie nie jest fajne

KapitanLeo:

Raphael przestań organizować bunty

~~Elektro~~:

MOC CHCEMY MOC

Bootyshaker9000:

G��osuje żeby obalić wszystkich Leo.

Bootyyyclapper9000:

NIEEEEEEEEE

bliźniak

ZjadłbyMózg:

Bliźniaki???? Ci dwaj???

Kurwa:

Ja pierdole

A ja myślałem że bycie bliźniakami z Mikeyem było złe

Współczuję

MaMózg:

Raphie jest moim bliźniakiem

Czasami

Mądrala:

Co proszę

Czasami?

>>wyciszony czat<<

KapitanLeo:

@wszyscy

Czyj Mikey krzyczy na kanale głosowym ASMR od trzech godzin bez przerwy, czy mógłbyś go wyciągnąć?

MaMózg:

Proszę wybaczyć, to mój

Zastanawiałem się, dlaczego był taki cichy

~~Elektro~~:

TRZY GODZIŃY SHDHSJJSK

Mądrala:

To jest trzeci raz w czterech dniach.

Prosze kontrolować twojego Mikeya albo będę musiał użyć forsy

MaMózg:

Nie martw się, zajmę się tym.

>>ASMR Żółwie!<<

[Audio]

ZgóbiłMózg:

[Mikey krzyczy do mikrofonu tak głośno jak tylko może. Jego głos waha się od wysokich pisków po niskie piski, a wszystkie zgrzytliwe dźwięki są zniekształcane przez mikrofon. Mikey milczy przez chwilę, po czym mówi:

“Chcesz żebym przyniósł mój kot do mikrofonu?” się pyta, i, nie czekając na odpowiedź, zaczyna głośno miauczeć. Jest taki głośny że które niemal zagłuszają wściekły krzyk dochodzący z oddali.

Słychać walenie. Mikey krzyczy.

“Co ty pierdzielisz?!” warczy niski głos.

“Hej, Raphie! To tylko trochę relaksującego ASMR! Chciałbyś –“

Słyszeć huk i krzyk.

“Trzy godziny!”

“Ale to jest śmieszne –“

“Wracaj, gówniarzu!”

Z dalszej odległości nad mikrofonem słychać głośny trzask, po którym następuje kilka głośnych wrzasków. Słychać warczenie Rapha i brzmi to tak, jakby w pomieszczeniu przewrócono wiele rzeczy. Walka stale zwiększa głośność i chaos, aż rozbrzmiewa ostry głos.

“Co się tu dzieje?! Co mówiłem o walczeniu w pokojach?!”

Głos jest niski i władczy. Trzaski i huki ustają tylko na chwilę, po czym następuje głośny huk – brzmiący podejrzanie, jakby Mikey właśnie został rzucony o ścianę.

Dźwięki walki wracają dwa razy głośniej niż wcześniej; Krzyknięcia “PRZESTAŃ!” i “NIE GRYŹ GO!” od Lea tylko gorsząc sprawę.

Kolejne szczególnie głośny łomot i chrząknięcie. Leo warczy.

“Czy ty mnie uderzyłeś?”

“To był Raph!”

“Okej, prosisz się o to –“ Leo syczy. Mikey krzyczy blisko mikrofonu gdy Leo dołącza do walki. W oddali słychać inny, wyższy głos (prawdopodobnie Donniego) błagający, aby przestali, „ponieważ rujnujecie kanał ASMR, wy neandertalczycy!”

“Hej Raph –“ Po minucie kolejnych trzasków rozbrzmiewa zuchwały, gruby głos i wrzeszczy. „Zastanawiałem się, czy nie chciałbyś kogoś pobić – czekaj, walczymy?!

“Casey, nie!”

“GOONGALA!”

Dźwięk zostaje nagle przerwany po odgłosie tłuczonego szkła.]

>>wyciszony czat<<

Kurwa:

Co to było

Mądrala:

Moje uszy

O mój borze

KapitanLeo:

Myślę, że właśnie przeszedłem przez wszystkie pierścienie piekła na raz

—

2: Komora Izolacyjna

>> Wojojo Żółwie Ninini <<

~~Elektro~~:

Czy ktoś mi da roztopiony wosk planuje eksperyment kulinarny

Chwila

Zły chat

ChcęMózg:

Przepraszam

~~Elektro~~:

zapomni o tym

ChcęMózg:

Nie?

~~Elektro~~:

jaaaaa cie brzmisz jak dziadek stary leo

wyobraź interpunkcję

nie ja

Mądrala:

I oto miałem zamiar ogłosić pewne aktualizacje serwera

Ale teraz się martwię dlaczego pytasz się o roztopiony wosk

~~Elektro~~:

Ignoruj to proszę chcę słyszeć o aktualizacji!!!!!111!!

ChcęMózg:

Nie nie ja chcę wiedzieć o roztopionym wosku

Brzmi jak coś mój Donnie by próbował gotować

MaMózg:

Nie docienasz nauki przed moich eksperymentów, Leo.

ChcęMózg:

Uważaj co mówisz

Zabiorę ci mózg

MaMózg:

Przepraszam, o wielki przywódco

ZgóbiłMózg:

czy wyczuwam… sarkazm? Od Donniego?

MaMózg:

Mikey, radzę ci trzymać się z daleka od tej domowej kłótni, zanim uznam, że nie warto dzisiaj naprawić twojej konsoli do gier

ZgóbiłMózg:

AUUYGHHA

~~Elektro~~:

@Mądrala

Dee

Dee

aktualizacje???

Kurwa:

mam twój roztopiony wosk i casey powiedział że przyniesie proch strzelniczy jeśli pozwolimy mu oglądać

Czerwień:

ŻE CO???

ChcęMózg:

Przepraszam

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Zostałem wezwany, kiedy widziałem dyskusje na temat eksplozji, drodzy bracia naprzemienni. W czym mogę pomóc?

Czerwień:

Nie zmuszaj mnie, żebym umieścił cię w więzieniu powietrznym Donnie

Nie zachęcaj go błagam

MaMózg:

Przynajmniej Mikey nie widział tej konwersacji

ZgóbiłMózg:

EKSPLOZJE???

TAAAAAAAAAAK

MaMózg:

Mikey pamiętasz naszą rozmowę?

ZgóbiłMózg:

Nie

ChcęMózg:

Zabij mnie

Czerwień:

Czy on zawsze żartuje o śmierci?

MaMózg:

Zdziwiłbyś się

Gdy nie robi głupich, niebezpiecznych decyzji to robi to -_-

ChcęMózg:

Moje decyzje nie są niebezpieczne

ZjadłbyMózg:

Ostatnim tygodniu chciałeś skoczyć z wieżowca na autobus bez jakiegoś spadochronu żeby oddać portfel jakieś baby

Gów.no

~~Elektro~~:

umieram sksksk

ChcęMózg:

>:(

~~Elektro~~:

HAHAHAH PIERDOLE

TEN PIERDOLONY

>:(

FZIADEK DZIADEK

Kurwa:

typowy leo

Czerwień:

@Bootyyyclapper9000

nie

nie rób tego.

Mądrala:

Każdej sekundzie kiedy tu jestem, umieram trochę w środku

~~Elektro~~:

dołącz do nas

dołącz do nas

@~MagicznyMikey~

@ZgóbiłMózg

~MagicznyMiky~:

Dołącz do nas

Dołącz do nas

ZgóbiłMózg:

dołącz do nas

dołącz do nas

ChcęMózg:

Okej wystarczy mi kultu Mikey’ego na jeden dzień

KapitanLeo:

Ogłoszenie, Donnie?

ZgóbiłMózg:

[Nagrywanie Głosu]

[Bardzo głośny, długi nagranie Mikey’a wydającego dźwięk pierdzenia ustami.]

MaMózg:

Bardzo przepraszam

Ciągle robi siarę

ZjadłbyMózg:

@ZgóbiłMózg a ty się dziwisz dlaczego od prawie roku nie dostałeś mózgu

ZgóbiłMózg:

[Nagrywanie Głosu]

[Dłuższy i głośniejszy dźwięk pierdzenia.]

ZjadłbyMózg:

Przysięgam pewnego dnia wyrwę mu język

Mądrala:

Nie ma potrzeby, mam rozwiązanie!

Obserwuj!

>@ZgóbiłMózg był wysłany do Komory Izolacji przez @Mądrala na 120 minut<

Kurwa:

HAHA CO

CO TO JEST

~~Elektro~~:

nieeee

zabrano nam mikey’a!!!

ZjadłbyMózg:

Nie mam pojęcia co to było ale jest świetne

KapitanLeo:

ach –

ChcęMózg:

Nareszcie, cisza i spokój

Bootyyyclapper9000:

HEJO

HEJO

CO

jaaaaaa don ddsłownie powiedzał „idź prosto do więzieniaa ”

Mądrala:

To jest coś co @DrużynaDonnie nazywają Komora Izolacji!

Stworzyliśmy go po incydencie ASMR, który stworzył Michelangelo z światu 03

KapitanLeo:

To był najgorszy dzień mojego życia

Planowałem sobie relaksującą sesję ASMR ale zamiast tego musiałem słuchać wściekłego żółwia drapiącego widelcem tablicę i krzyczącego słowa do „Barbie Girl”

Bootyyyclapper9000:

iksde CO

Kiedy to się stało???

MaMózg:

Wzięliśmy legalną akcje

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Dokładnie! Osoby w Komorze Izolacyjnym mogą tylko wysyłać wiadomości w tym kanale, gdzie mają pół godziny na przedstawienie swojej sprawy, zanim cały wyrok wejdzie w życie!

Kurwa:

Przedstawienie?

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Mogą zrobić cokolwiek myślą pomoże im wyjść

ZjadłbyMózg:

Możemy zrobić takie coś w norze @MaMózg @ChcęMózg żebyśmy mogli zamknąć mikey’a na zawsze

ChcęMózg:

On próbuje włamać się do mojego pokoju abym wpuścił go z powrotem do czatu, więc myślę że powinniśmy to omówić na następnym posiedzeniu zarządu żółwi

Czerwień:

Ja, my powinniśmy organizować takie spotkania

Kiedykolwiek moi bracia mają jakieś pomysły, wszyscy po prostu na siebie krzyczymy przy śniadaniu i wygrywa najg��ośniejszy

~MagicznyMikey~:

Ja zawsze wygrywam

KapitanLeo:

Co??

Kurwa:

hej ja chcę krzyczeć

Bootyyyclapper9000:

“posiedzenie zarządu żółwi” sksjsjsks

Mądrala:

A to nie wszystko! Stworzyliśmy osobne grupy tylko dla naszych odpowiedników! I nareszcie udoskonaliliśmy rozmowę wideo!

Dla tego jest nowy kanał „wideo czat” a także są one dostępne we wszystkich czatach oprócz tego

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Nie ma za co

~~Elektro~~:

TAK

KULT MIKEY’A

~MagicznyMikey~:

HEJ HEJ

Kurwa:

Nareszcie, donnie! Wasze paplacie o nauce i nudach mnie nudziło

ChcęMózg:

@DrużynaDonnie to jest świetne, macie moją wdzięczność :)

ZjadłbyMózg:

no, to będzie ekstra

Po prostu trzymaj mnie Z DALA od czata mikey’ego

MaMózg:

Dzięujei!! Zajęło nam dużo czasu, ale było warto!

Czerwień:

Łał, to jest bardzo miłe z waszej strony! Na prawdę nie musiliście!

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Po co zadowalać się podstawami, skoro dzięki naszemu doskonałemu intelektowi możemy rozwijać się w nieskończoność!

Bootyyyclapper9000:

gdybm nei byl taki ekstydowamy na to @Bootyyyshaker9000 nazwał bym cie mądralą iksde

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Nie zapomnij że mam moc cię wysłać do Komoru Isolacji z Michelangelem, drogi bliźniaku

~~Elektro~~:

czy dlatego toster jest zepsuty @Mądrala??? bo pracowałeś nad tym???

Mądrala:

Znowu zepsuliście toster???

A tu myślałem że miałem szansę się relaksować -_-

Kurwa:

E tam, ty lubisz robić pierdoły jak budowanie tosterów

Następnym razem nie pozwolimy leowi go używać

Mądrala:

Nie wiem czemu, ale raczej ciebie nie wierzę

MaMózg:

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: zrzut ekranu czegoś, co wygląda na podróbkę Discorda, zatytułowany „Komora Izolacji”. Znajduje się w nim ta sama wiadomość spamowana w kółko: „WYPUŚĆ MNIE” autorstwa 03 Michelangelo. Wiadomości są powoli pisane coraz bardziej chaotycznie.]

Chcę być wypuszczony.

~~Elektro~~:

ktoś my pomóc!

KapitanLeo:

@Mądrala Poprosiłem żebyś naprawił toster wieki temu :(

I to nie moja wina że się psuje kiedykolwiek go urzywam

Kurwa:

Wsadziłeś do niego łyżkę

KapitanLeo:

No bo mój tost utknął w tosterze a mówią że nie powinno wsadzać noży do tostera

Potrzebowałem czegoś żeby go wyjąć

~~Elektro~~:

leo

leonardo

ten tost był weglem

KapitanLeo:

Wcale że nie!

Bootyyyshaker9000:

@KapitanLeo jak myślałeś że łyżka by pomogła, jestem cziekawy

Ale to brzmi trochę jak Niebieski

Bootyyyclapper9000:

:(

nie miłe

~~Elektro~~:

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: bryła czarnej sadzy]

@KapitanLeo czy to wygląda jak tost dla ciebie???

ZjadłbyMózg:

“tylko trochę podpalone”

MaMózg:

Jak ci się to udało zrobić z tosterem???

KapitanLeo:

Nie widzę żadnego problemu!

To normalny tost!

ChcęMózg:

To wygląda toksyczne

ZjadłbyMózg:

daj to naszemu Mikeowi

Prawdopodobnie by to zjadł gdybyś mu dał paczkę miśków

Czerwień:

Co to jest???

KapitanLeo:

Okej teraz mnie atakujecie :(

Kurwa:

HAHAHHAHA

>> Komora Izolacji <<

ZgóbiłMózg:

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

ZgóbiłMózg:

[Nagranie Głosu]

[Nieczytelne krzyki]

ZgóbiłMózg:

[Nagranie Głosu]

[“WYPUŚĆ MNIE!” Mikey krzyczy w rózniących się tonach, za blisko mikrofonu więc brzmi bardzo zniekształcono. Powtarza się w kółko, zanim nagle urywa się.]

ZgóbiłMózg:

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

WYPUŚĆ MNIE

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Michelangelo Splinterson od WSZECHŚWIAT_03, zostałeś postawiony przed sądem, aby bronić swojego honoru i odwołać się od wyroku 120 minut w Komorze Izolacyjnej.

Będziesz miał pół godziny na przedstawienie swojej sprawy Radzie Donów, gdzie zostaniesz osądzony na podstawie siły argumentacji, filozofii i talentu. Możesz to zrobić w dowolny sposób.

Jeśli uznamy Twoją argumentację za godną szacunku, wypuścimy Cię z Izolacji, gdzie będziesz mógł ponownie dołączyć do wszystkich czatów.

MaMózg:

Trzeci Donatello z tej Rady jest zajęty, więc my będziemy jedyni z człąkow z Rady z którymi będziesz się dzisiaj kłócić.

Masz pół godziny.

Użyj twój czas mądrze.

ZgóbiłMózg:

[Deskrypcja Zdjęcia: bardzo powiększone zdjęcie twarzy Klunk, tak że widoczne są tylko jej oczy i pysk. Jej oczy są rozszerzone, patrzy się prosto w kamerę. Obraz jest nieco zamazany na krawędziach.]

kot

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Przekonał mnie

>>Radza Donów<<

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Wypuśćiłem twojego brata @MaMózg

Miał świetny argument

Mistrz w manipulacji

MaMózg:

Powiedział jedno słowo

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Świetny argument

@Mądrala czy jesteś wolny? Jeszcze nam nie opowiadłesz o twoim ulubionym dinozaurze lub grzyba i jestem ciekawy

MaMózg:

Nie dręcz go! Prawdopodobnie jest zajęty naprawianiem tostera.

Bootyyyshaker9000:

@Mądrala

@Mądrala

Dinozaur?

MaMózg:

Naprawdę?

Mądrala:

Nie mam czasu rozmawiać, sorki

Muszę chłopakom naprawiać rzeczy

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Ciągle jesteś zajęty nudnymi rzeczami jak naprawianie tosterów

Wszyscy wiemy, że naprawiliśmy toster, zanim nauczyliśmy się chodzić

MaMózg:

Nie chcę się wytrącać w nie swoje sprawy, ale Fiolet ma rację. Zauważyłem że twoi braci byli trochę… dokuczliwi jak ci pytali o naprawianiu tego tostera?

Nic nie szkodzi jak nie chcesz o tym rozmawiać, ale wyglądało że byli trochę insensytywni gdy spędzałeś taki długi czas w pomaganiu nam z programowaniem tego czatu

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Czy ty w ogóle dostajesz czas na twoje własne sprawy??

Mądrala:

Wszystko jest okej.

Po prostu nie byłem wystarczająco szybki w naprawach tego dnia. Moi bracia byli sfrustrowani tylko dlatego, że zawsze mam dla nich rozwiązanie i tak właśnie jest.

@Bootyyyshaker9000 Jestem zbyt zajęty utrzymywaniem nory w porządku i robieniem własnych rzeczy

MaMózg:

Moi bracia szanują moje życzenie, gdy coś zepsują to przyjdą do mnie po pomoc ale to nie konieczność.

Rozumią że mam swoje małe projekty w którymi często przesadzam.

Nie chciałem, żeby to zabrzmiało krytycznie w stosunku do twoich braci! Chciałem tylko podzielić się swoją perspektywą :)

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Twoi bracia mogą się odpierdolić

Pomposity przestań naprawiać rzeczy dla nich

To nie twój obowiązek żeby zawsze mieć odpowiedź, i nie powinieneś zawracać sobie głowy zmianą planu zajęć, żeby poprawić sytuację wtedy, gdy uznają to za najwygodniejsze

Urządzenie kuchenne są takie… prymitywne. W twoim miejscu bym oszalał

Mądrala:

Na prawdę wszystko jest okej. Moja odpowiedzialność jest naprawianie ich problemy, i to tyle.

Trzeba używać ten mózg na coś produktywnego

Muszę wrócić do pracy

MaMózg:

O.

Nie powinniśmy wtrącać się w twoje osobiste sprawy, rozumię

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Ja nie

MaMózg:

Spodziewałem się.

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Przestałem naprawiać rzeczy dla moich bracia i wiesz co się stało? Nauczyli się być ostrożni. I nigdy żaden z nich nie marudził do mnie że jestem ‚za wolny’ w moich naprawach, albo że czegoś nie wiem.

Twoi bracia brzmią jak dupki.

MaMózg:

Fiolet! Wystarczy!

Mądrala:

Wolałbym o tym nie rozmawiać.

Zmieńmy temat

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Nie

MaMózg:

Tak.

Ulubiony dinozaur?

Mądrala:

Stegozaur. Są proste, ale fascynujące.

MaMózg:

Kocham stegozaury! Mam kilka faktów o nich!

Mądrala:

Porównajmy notatki

Powinienem mieć czas na to, to jest ważne

Bootyyyshaker9000:

Dinozaury zawsze są ważne, przyjacielu

Yo, this is sick!

[h00tzz]

I return with: more gay old dudes, (mostly) ocs edition

Bikini Transgineer... amen

[telesodalite]

Another rambling thought, sort of stemming from the last thing, but what if Misfire gets so upset about Krok believing he's contacting his old squad, and pretending or implying that they're still alive, because he's harboring some sort of repressed grief over Thundersaur?

Thundersaur's dying request being to free Flyhigh before he ends up in jail for a dozen counts of "accidental" murder implies a certain kind of closeness or something felt towards Misfire. Yet, we don't really see anything returned from Misfire's side? Outside of the "-You're just jealous because you've never had someone look out for you." comment he makes in response to Spinister's disbelief towards him being the type to end up on someone's "dying wish list".

So, there's that. What can be gleaned from just that? Not much ig, at least nothing concrete. But taking into account Misfire's relationship with Grimlock, and Grimlock's later view of Connie, perhaps something can be assumed about his relationship with Thundersaur.

Whether I'm reading into it too much or not, there is a theme of a sometimes rough but well intended trickle down kindness when it comes to the Scavengers and their story.

A favor or act of kindness is shown to one, and they return it back or onto another, sometimes unintentionally. There's emphasized acts of selflessness with them, even though we know them to be quite selfish, which, really only emphasizes those moments more. If they were written as less of a joking break between the drama of the Lost Light cast, perhaps this theme would've played a deeper more defined role. But anyways, my subjective character favoritism aside.

The point here is Misfire cared for Grimlock, and in turn, Grimlock chooses to care for Connie because it's "his turn" to look after someone. One act of empathy leads to another. There's a time to decide when it's your turn.

So it's possible it goes further back because of that. Thundersaur cared for Misfire, then it was Misfire's "turn" and he cared for Grimlock, and Grimlock cared for Connie.

So why doesn't Misfire say or mention anything about Thundersaur? Grimlock cares a lot for Misfire, wouldn't Misfire have cared a lot for Thundersaur?

Well, in a way, there's a possible answer for that. Misfire is shown to be uncomfortable when faced with admitting he cares for people, or needs people. He's uncomfortable with vulnerability. He gets defensive and snappy when pressed about it, or he deflects it away from himself, which is somewhat of a stark change to his more casual dramatics and honest friendliness. So he doesn't like talking about how he feels, how he really feels.

But he also admits to Grimlock he understands missing the people you cared about. He admits this in connection to Grimlock recalling the last time he was with his "Dino-Buddies", just before Grimlock was taken to Garrus 9. Misfire "gets it", even though it's hard, he gets it.

With all that possibly pointless evidence, we can guess that yeah, Misfire did care for Thundersaur. It's just that he, like the rest of the Scavengers, has his own repressed and poorly managed issues relating to his past and his own negative emotions.

Also, the death thing. He's real casual about dead stuff. He exsanguinates and cannibalizes corpses as a job/hobby, and enjoys it. There's an implied acceptance that he's okay with the fact that the Scavs will eat each other as soon as someone happens to keel over, which includes him also being dead and eaten. He's cool with that, ig. Or at least, he's cool with eating the others if the situation presents itself.

So he's got a weird relationship with life and death. When you're alive, you're a friend. When you're dead? Well, it's not really you anymore, is it? It's not someone you care about anymore, it's just a corpse, not a person, it's just resources in an empty vessel, not a friend. Nothing worth getting emotional or upset about. Perfect for being comfortably detached.

Because this is getting way too long tho, here's the point I'm trying to get to.

Why does Misfire lose his shit a little when Krok starts panicking and trying to call for his squad? Here's my theory, I guess.

Thundersaur is dead. He died, and he's gone, and Misfire knows this. He wasn't there. He didn't get to say goodbye. He didn't get to return the favor or repay the debt. He didn't get to show Thundersaur that he cared for others too, that he passed that on.

But while he accepts it, he doesn't want to think about it. Doesn't want to dwell on it, doesn't want to acknowledge that he misses Thundersaur. He's dead, he's gone. So it doesn't matter. Misfire can't need him anymore, and he doesn't want to admit he needs anyone anymore, because someone he relied on is dead, and he wasn't there for them to rely on in turn.

So he doesn't think about it. But Krok does. Krok thinks about it, and talks about it, and still admits to needing his dead. Even if he won't acknowledge the fact that they're dead, and gone, and never coming back, no matter how much he wants or needs them anymore.

And it feels unfair, and Krok keeps unintentionally poking at that repressed grief Misfire won't touch. A reminder with every click of that dismembered finger, that you can't always just will away the grief of loss, of death. There's going to be reminders everywhere. Even close to you. And so, faced with reminder after reminder, the repression breaks, and Misfire snaps because-

They're all dead.

Krok's squad is dead. Thundersaur is dead. Why can't they accept that and just move on to never talking about it, never mentioning it, never thinking about it again?

Because, in their own ways, neither of them have ever truly moved on.

[in-a-cave-with]

the stan lee quote of "i wanted to give myself a challenge to make the readers like a weapons manufacturer industrialist character at the height of the cold war" etc gets passed around a whole lot but nobody ever talks about how he actually went about solving this challenge which is to give the weapons manufacturer industrialist severe mental health issues

[batsplat]

so in assen 2004 comms talk about how valentino helped melandri with riding yamaha A Lot, and how they are two great friends. and indeed those two have known each other since childhood/or at least their teens right? (seen a lot of their photos w matching terrible dye jobs) but then fast forward to 2010 and melandri is going full conspiracy theorist about the freaking chair affghhhkgjk. like what happened here? is it any interesting or is it like mostly one sided bitterness from melandri or something. like that can’t really be about 2005 season for vale bc come on melandri wasn’t his main rival that year.

even if it’s not interesting feud or drama wise it is another friendship that vale had (and unlike w sete vale&melandri go way back) that eventually fell apart as a result of competing in motogp…….hm

yeah, we don't actually have a great sense of what happened there! it's funny the coldness seems to have crept in during the 2005 season specifically, because I'm very much with you here on the 'come on valentino why bother' stance - melandri was aggressively not a proper title contender that season and really not even the main on-track rival... but actually I do think this fits in rather nicely within my sete thesis, which we'll get to. the subsequent public bitterness has been entirely one-sided, with melandri occasionally saying something kinda mean-spirited about valentino in recent years and valentino... not doing any of that

anyhow, they definitely WERE close, which was hammered home not just through repeated mentions by the commentators but also when you read the columns he was dictating every race for mat oxley in his early years. here, from his 250cc days:

mugello 1998

I wasn’t so confident before Mugello because while I was at home I played football and lost, I played tennis and lost, I rode motocross and lost. The only thing I won was minicars – I am the champion! We got beaten in a five-a-side soccer match, six-one, then a friend beat me at tennis, six-one, then Marco [Melandri] beat me at motocross. I’m always fighting with Marco on motocross but he’s faster than me. I’m getting better though – at the start of the year he’d beat me by five or six seconds, now it’s only one or two. I have much fear when I ride motocross because I’m not good at flying. We don’t go crazy; it would be stupid to get hurt doing that. Motocross is great for my muscle power though. I don’t go the gym much in the summer because I want to be outside, so motocross is perfect.

paul ricard 1998

As usual, my break between Mugello and France was full of battles with my friends! First we played football and my team won on penalties. I scored the winner. I never make a mistake from the penalty spot. Next day I did motocross with Melandri and he beat me, as usual, but we had some very funny races. Then I raced with Melandri again, but with electric cars. He’s bought a Honda NSX – it’s fast. Before I left for France we raced minimoto at a track in Rimini. There were about 20 of us: me, Melandri and a load of fast, young Italian riders. We had a lot of really crazy battles. Lots of fun! I don’t think it’s dangerous because the bikes aren’t so fast, maybe 60kp/h. I had some big fights with Melandri, we hit each other all the time – BANG! BANG! BANG! – and we crashed together maybe two or three times.

madrid 1998

I’m doing motocross three times a week now to help build up strength, but Melandri is still faster than me, so I’ve started practising in secret. I get dressed into my motocross gear, then ring him to tell him we don’t need to ride today, then do a few hours riding in secret! Soon I will be faster than him! Anyway, I beat him in minimoto before we went to Jarama.

assen 1998

“Hooray, finally I am first on a 250! It was the day of the teenager at Assen, the Italian teenager! I was so happy when my friend Melandri won the 125 race, so it was fantastic to go out and win the 250. A perfect day, except Marco and me couldn’t party on Saturday night, because I flew home to celebrate with my friends, while he stayed at Assen. I guess we’ll make sure we have a beer together before Donington.

donington 1998

We had our own paddock World Cup at Donington on Thursday, which was really shit, because we played three games and lost three games. I played in the Italian team with Melandri, Boscoscuro, Scalvini, Locatelli, Borsoi and Carpani. First we played the Suzuki 500 team and lost, then we played Team Rainey and lost, and finally we played Dorna, and lost. Dorna were all Spanish and very good. But the games weren’t so much fun because the pitch was tiny and really bumpy. Last year we had the paddock World Cup at Imola on a full-size pitch, and I scored twice. Nice!

sachsenring 1998

Now we have a four-week holiday before Brno, but I’m going to spend most of my time on the beach near my home – it’s sunny and the girls are nice, that’s all I need! But I am going away for one week – a racers’ holiday with Loris Reggiani, Roberto Locatelli and Melandri. We’re going to Tunisia to mess about with jet skis and fast boats. Should be a lot of fun!

sepang 1999

The winter was fun. Usually I don’t like the winter because it’s too cold, but where I live, near the Adriatic coast, there are so many people in the summer. That didn’t used to be a problem, but now everyone recognises me, so it’s Rossi! Rossi! Rossi! all the time. I don’t like it! I spent a lot of time with my friends, as that’s when I’m happiest. We went skiing a few times, a big gang of us. Mad! Snowboarding is more fashionable nowadays but I’m faster on skis, so it’s better! Melandri came with me once, he’s my best mate in the paddock, plus Alessandro Brannetti, a new Italian 125 guy.

mugello 1999

Before Mugello I spent some time at home, riding my 250 road bike and going motocrossing. I have a new motocross bike at home, but I can’t tell you what it is, because it’s not an Aprilia! But it’s a lot of fun on the new motocross track I’ve built behind a friend’s house. I dug the ground myself with a JCB digger we hired. I have designed the track to be safe for me, because modern motocross tracks have near-vertical take-off jumps, which are very dangerous if you don’t have good control in the air. And I don’t! So I’ve built low and fast jumps which I can take in fourth or fifth gear and be safe. Big fun! I’m looking forward to racing my friend Melandri, who hasn’t been doing motocross since he broke his wrist in Malaysia.

sachsenring 1999

Now we have a four-week holiday, hooray! All I really want to do is sleep. During the break last year I went to Tunisia with a bunch of friends like Melandri, but all I want to do now is stay home and rest. My home is near a holiday resort anyway, near the Adriatic Sea, but to be honest I don’t like the sea so much. I prefer snow...”

argentina 1999

I already have some plans for the winter. The World Championship may have finished, but I already have two more races over the next few weeks. No rest yet! First is the X Race at Misano. This is a special event for GP and world Superbike riders. I’m racing go-karts, motocross and cars with [Carl] Fogarty, Melandri, Capirossi, Harada and a lot of other guys. They ran this event for the first time last year and I won it. It’s only fun of course but I want to win again because winning is always important. Then at the end of November I’m doing a car rally at Monza.

so yeah, clearly close buddies! I'm sure there's more out there about their friendship, but I've never been that invested in digging into the details lol. about the collapse of the relationship... well, there's this from the barker biography, which kinda lumps melandri into a generic section about valentino's rivals:

Marco Melandri, who had been a close friend of Rossi's for years before he started winning races in 2005, noted the same shift in attitude: 'When I started to race well with him he changed a lot. When we were growing up we were very good friends. Valentino plays games with everybody... the way he talked to the media - he tries to never say something good about you.'

in 2007, after valentino had finally lost a title fight (and was in the process of losing another), there's another oxley column where a few key figures like his teammate edwards, his rival hayden, and his crew chief jb were asked about what made valentino so good. and valentino's crew chief jb was kind enough to give his own take on the melandri dynamic:

“He only uses mind games when people make a serious challenge, then he pulls out that extra tool in his armoury, which he did with Max, with Sete and to a lesser degree with Marco. Then there’s Loris, who is also serious challenge, but there’s a different understanding between them, there’s a respect. When I first worked with Valentino he was mates with Marco. Whenever there was a dinner or a party, Marco was always there. When Marco came to MotoGP it was still fine, then when there was any sort of a challenge their friendship cooled off a bit."

and then by 2010 you get melandri be like. full yellow chair conspiracy theorist. now, he also mentions how his own celebrations were received, and we do actually have jorge himself give his review of said celebrations a few years earlier (x, x):

I don't really have a point here, I just think it's funny

whereas from valentino's side.... well, there's really not much. his autobiography goes until the end of 2004 and is published in 2005 - so if melandri was already a 'proper' rival when the book was finalised, it will have been a very recent thing... but there's literally one reference to melandri in the whole thing, and it's something generic to do with the yamaha's development. valentino himself has said pretty much fuck all about this friendship falling apart. it's a bit frustrating because... when melandri says that valentino tries never to say anything good about you in the media - look, that's probably referring to something substantive, but we don't really know what exactly valentino supposedly said. we just have to take melandri at his word.... when you go that far back, it's a lot trickier to hunt down specifics if it's not a big news story, if there's not been a major controversy

you do have this from mid 2005:

"No. I think this is not true," replied Rossi, when asked if he deliberately avoided friendships with his closest rivals. "With Melandri, when this year he start to go fast, especially the Italian journalists, try to put some bad things between us - to make fight like what happened between Biaggi and Doohan. "But I go to speak to Melandri after Shanghai, on the podium, because I say one thing and the Italian journalists they modify and say to him another thing - and also the same journalists come to me and make the same. "I know Marco from minibikes when we were friends - we've been friends for more than ten-years - so I try to keep a good relationship because I don't like a bad relationship with anybody," he insisted. "For sure I have had a bad relationship with Biaggi and Gibernau but I don't think that is the right result."

now, according to the article, there were already rumours at the time that the relationship had grown colder that year. which is mainly funny insofar as valentino had quite literally double melandri's points - and the latter still hadn't won a race. again. what's the point

which, well. I do think jb's mention of capirossi is kinda interesting, as another rival valentino had known forever and one who wasn't like. dramatically less likely than melandri to end up a serious challenger to valentino, beyond being a bit older already. jb mentions they have an "understanding", a "respect" between the two of them... it's also maybe worth bringing in what hayden, the man who had actually managed to beat him in 2006, had to say about valentino for the same oxley piece:

“I can’t say it’s just his approach that makes him good. Some guys take their racing real serious, others are really laid back, it’s whatever works for that rider. But regardless of whatever he does he definitely gets around the track fast, that’s what’s most important. “One thing I noticed when we were team-mates is that he looks like it’s fun, fun, fun, he definitely cuts up a lot, but once you’re in the garage that dude is so serious, so focused. Everything seems perfect, right down to the windscreen sticker and the colour of his boots. He doesn’t overlook anything and I think that’s a big part of it. “More than anything it’s the racer in him that makes him so strong, it’s obvious the guy wants to win. He’s got a lot of natural talent but I know a lot of guys with natural talent and it gets some guys in trouble. It’s the whole package that makes him strong: the desire, the focus, the talent. “I think sometimes maybe he’s not as laidback as he comes across. He knows what to say and when to say it to make it look like things aren’t really getting to him. He knows how to play it, on the bike and off the bike. “It’s hard to say what he’s like with mind games because I can only comment on how he’s been with me and I’ve never seen him play any games with me, especially last year when he was taking chunks out of my points lead. The guy didn’t really change, maybe he just knew that I wasn’t going to roll over. Maybe some of the guys he can break down mentally, maybe he knew it wasn’t going to get to me. “Him and JB (Jeremy Burgess) haven’t won all those titles just through his riding, they know how to play people, they know how to play their cards, when to show their hand, when not to show their hand. I don’t think he plays as many games as other guys – you don’t need to play a lot of games when you can ride like that.“ "On track sure he’s aggressive but he’s totally clean and he definitely has a lot of tactics. He knows when he wants to race just one guy, how to separate groups, how to slow down. Like Phillip Island in 2005 I was on him the whole race and he eventually saw that he wasn’t going to get away, so he slowed down, brought the next group up to us to get me caught up with them, then tried to make another break. He’s got a lot of race craft. “I’d say his biggest strength is that he can adapt. If the tyres go off and he needs to slide he can slide, when the bike need to be ridden in line he can ride in line, he can definitely adapt to situations. I can’t say there’s one area of his riding where he just kills guys. It’s not just braking or corner speed or this or that, I’d just say that when he’s in a rhythm and putting those laps down he can break a guy. Like at Jerez this year he broke Pedrosa by about half a tenth a lap, he just kept putting those laps down, riding on that edge. He doesn’t ride 95 per cent, he rides on that razor edge for a long time. “I don’t know about weaknesses, it’s hard for me to point out a guy’s weakness when he’s won all those championships. In fact I’m not going to say he’s got any weak points because I don’t need to motivate the guy! That’s why I don’t want to say anything negative, I’m a big believer in not motivating these guys anymore, that’s why I don’t talk trash.”

like, you do have to bring up the context that valentino had four title rivals in 2006 - melandri, hayden, capirossi and dani - and he really only seems to have cooled off towards one of them. I'm not saying it's melandri's fault! I think it's more... hm, it's a bit telling, isn't it? competitively, there's not really any reason for melandri to be singled out in any way. I mean, you'll note he didn't win the title - and the guy who did explicitly says he didn't think valentino was fucking with him. valentino says in 2005 that he's made an active effort to not let the melandri relationship get worse... which could be true insofar as he didn't want any drama, but clearly he did allow that friendship to grow cold. why do that? is melandri really such a threat? I feel like if valentino said something particularly egregious about melandri, we would have some kind of a record of it - but let's say he was just mildly bitchy about the guy. you'd want to take him to one side and tell him 'dude, you really needn't bother', right? like, no offence, but is THIS guy worth it?

except. well. it is a little interesting that in the immediate aftermath of 2004, valentino had another friend of his (who he had considerably more history with than his last title rival) head over to honda gresini, turn into a more serious challenger... and valentino went. 'hm, yeah, maybe let's not do that again.' whether consciously or subconsciously, he does seem to have drawn back from melandri a hell of a lot quicker than he did from sete - and let's not forget that sete was actually beating him in dramatic last lap duels, which melandri extremely did not do. now, look, of course there COULD have been some sort of private spat here that nobody involved ever talked about... or maybe valentino just decided for completely unrelated reasons he'd had enough of melandri. but isn't it just. a little noteworthy. that when it comes to the 2006 title rivals, valentino is on good terms with all of them, who he seemingly does not piss off too badly with any sort of off-track antics... except melandri. his coldest relationship is with his childhood friend. one might conclude that melandri was the one who had the most power to hurt valentino, if he had been allowed to remain close. one could argue that there the sete rivalry marked a bit of a turning point in terms of how valentino approached his rivalries, that after this point he really didn't want another rivalry that could affect him in the same way. one might point out that some of the details of the melandri rivalry sure feel like they could be used to back up this framing

all that being said. what valentino is doing here is... well, it's basically fine, isn't it. everyone and their dog agrees it's tough to remain friends with your actual close rivals. jb describes it as their friendship 'cooling off', which is also the kind of thing that can just... eventually happen with childhood friends, even when you don't have pressures of competition warping interpersonal dynamics. there's not all that much to suggest valentino was massively treating melandri differently from any of his other major rivals at the time - it's just that his prior relationship had been closer and melandri seems to have taken the shift poorly. given how little of a paper trail there is, it feels like any mind games on valentino's part were generally on the subtler side, perhaps just the occasional snide comment or insinuation or ambiguously shady line that never made it to an article we can still access nowadays. more in line with what nicky "I don't think he plays as many games as other guys" hayden is describing: how valentino knows how to play his cards without necessarily escalating it into full out war. when melandri's talking about the rivalry, at times he does seem less annoyed by anything valentino actually did than he is by the media pressure of being an italian rival of valentino's, of being subjected to a more hostile media environment tan valentino, etc etc. after a certain point, valentino was often a passive beneficiary of his own successes in that regard. it's not like he's telling the italian journalists to put extra pressure on melandri... but he's also hardly going to complain

in general, the timing of it does have a certain charm to it as useful evidence for my great big 'the sete experience changed how valentino approached his rivalries' thesis, but I'm always a tad wary of analyses that flatten valentino's rivalries and by extension valentino by treating the patterns of behaviour in each as identical. it's also worth pointing out that... well, melandri isn't exactly a neutral source here, and his 2010 great big yellow chair theory does maybe suggest his resentment was getting in the way of his judgement where valentino was concerned. in the end, people didn't enjoy melandri's celebrations as much as melandri would have liked. and at some point in 2005, valentino apparently decided he didn't like this guy's vibe any more. c'est la vie

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

okay weird q incoming but what ways do you think speedsters can get sick? Like to my understanding, they can’t really come down with normal virus’ like the flu, right? But they could get things like chronic migraines?

NANOBOTS!!! This is one of the best pieces of canon lore ever. I did a whole post on it but TLDR: normal human metabolisms have so much shit going on that they don't even notice nanobots in their body BUT speedsters have hyper accelerated metabolisms that are the equivalent of the straight A's overachiever in school on meth. So speedster metabolisms do notice nanobots and they attack full force, triggering all of the body's defenses and responses.

But the nanobots are metal so it obviously doesn't do anything. It just leaves the speedster lethargic, feverish, vomiting, dizzy, with a headache, sore muscles and a runny nose, ect. It's basically an allergic reaction.

Now, poisoning them can work depending on what the poison is/what the dosage is. You would need a 100% fatal poison and you would need a fairly high dose. Because speedsters heal fast and they have a hyper accelerated metabolism, so any poison that is based on toxicity (alcohol poisoning for example) would be out of their system faster than it could even take effect.

But poisons that can't be cleared out/processed by the body (take cyanide for example, it binds with the chemical receptors in your body making it physically impossible to use oxygen) wouldn't really be affected by their metabolism at all. So while the speedsters could heal the damaged tissues from these poisons fairly quickly (making it seem as though they were only slightly affected) they would ultimately need time to do so, time they would not have if it kills them first. This isn't technically what you are asking because there would be no substance that 'makes them sick', there would only be 'fine', 'not fine for like a minute and then fine again' and 'dead'. (... unless they were hooked up to a steady supply of the toxin)

Likewise, (this is getting more into theoretical territory, less canon) there might be some illnesses that would affect them? Not for long but if you got something super fucking fatal like Rabies, it might make them display mild cold symptoms for a day or something.

I don't know though. They have really fucking good immune systems. And even super fatal diseases can be fought. Take my example of Rabies, while it is commonly thought to be 100% fatal once symptoms show up there actually have been cases of people surviving it. Rabies is a very stealthy and fast disease, so the main problem with treating it is that your body's immune system isn't fast enough to stop it. People have survived by being placed in medically induced comas (slowing their bodily functions and thus the disease) for long enough that the medication can eradicate it. So for a speedster? That's gone in a minute tops. You would need an insane disease that I'm not sure even exists.

There's also like... pregnancy and menstruation. Growing pains, muscle pain from running is a BIG ONE, being dehydrated/starvation, blood loss, ect. Lots of ways to fuck with a speedster in a way they can't immediately fix.

There are also speedster specific ailments. It's basically 50/50 if a natural born speedster gets a weird highly fatal aging disease. Sometimes speedsters can be born without a kinetic energy shield which makes using their powers at all incredibly fatal to them. All speedsters will have connectivity issues at some point that can be fatal. Sometimes Time Gets Bad™ (shout out to when Barry kept chronically stealing time from people/things every time he used his powers). Sometimes they have too much energy and can't maintain human form (shout out to when Wally didn't know what the speedforce was and was accidentally cosplaying Ghost Rider). Velocity 9 is a highly addictive drug that works on speedsters and makes them display typical addiction behavior (and withdrawal). V9 can also cause a speedster to 'overdose' (burst into flames/lightning/energy). They all have the constant urge to yeet themselves into the speedforce. Ect.

[your--isgayrights]

I'm rereading my comedy hanahaki fic and the funniest thing about it is that I honestly did look into the flower symbolism of all the different kinds of flower petals he throws up to represent his feelings and because my commentary point is that normal people can't identify flowers by their mucus drenched petals all of that specific research and reference DOES NOT MATTER and has NO effect on my experience as a reader of my own work who no longer remembers the specifics of said research... Like I mention the color of every petal he barfs up and it means NOTHING until the end lmaoooo

[heynhay]

How do you pump out art so frequently? I need to know pls

i was gonna answer this w a meme but i dont want anyone to go insane trying to replicate it so im gonna be genuine for a minute

if you mean like, how do i have time to pump out art, im lucky enough to only need to work like 30some hours a week and on top of that im living with my parents for the summer between school yrs so i also dont have to expend much time on day to day upkeep/errand running. its literally just that im fortunate enough to be able to afford downtime. it also means i have more energy from not doing those things so when downtime comes around i can use it on this stuff instead of sleeping or whateva

if you mean like, how do i find the inspiration? god only knows. this affliction descended upon my nigh a week ago now and has yet to relent. if you scroll down past that youll see i posted like. once every month or two. i guess just find your blorbos, anon

Oh! but while im on the advice giving train: publish garbage! publish linework with mismatched edges, draw arms that you know don't look quite right, release work you're pretty sure you'll hate later. If you can. its not always possible but like normalizing the messiest unfinished stuff can do wonders, because its just nice to see your idea come to life.

[chameleonsynthesis]

Once again the easiest way to deal with a problem proves to be just removing myself from the situation entirely.

If you blast music on your phone without headphones, the people sharing public transit with you should be allowed to smash it.

[crank2006]

chev chelios if you can hear us

[saltynametag]

me learning about the amazing digital circus: oh there’s so much fanart and theories about it, i wonder how far along it is…

me now: ITS ONE EPISODE?????????

[vitospaghetta]

Ok I keep kicking this back and forth so I'm gonna leave it up to a poll just to gauge what you guys think.

I would want to approach this in as non-argumentative a way as possible, with the purpose of course being to clear up misconceptions about their canonicity, as well as to give people a better understanding of how media like this exists alongside their source material.

What I've written here would be the foundation of the post, so there would be some overlap, but it would definitely be more in-depth, using examples from film novelizations and video game novelizations that I personally own, drawing comparisons from film clips or screenplays and corresponding cutscenes.

[pankomako]

i would pay actual money to see these three on stream together. three new englander gamers with very little sanity left

[saintridden]

more corpse paint p1 because i have literally nothing to do

[gibbearish]

it is fascinating seeing ppl say "if you still vote biden just bc he's protected trans rights youre putting your own rights above that of the other people he'll kill" bc i'm like. well that operates under the assumption the Not Biden Option won't be killing those same other people Plus Trans People and given the history of presidents i would say that is a. how should i say this. wild fucking assumption? like idk framing it as "hello transgender, would you rather kill a bunch of non-americans or a bunch of fellow trans people. oh, you don't want to kill trans people? so you personally want to kill non-americans? racist selfish piece of shit" seems uhhhhh disingenuous at absolute best and a psyop at worst

[archived-and-moving]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Keeper of the Lost Cities Series - Shannon Messenger Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Sophie Foster/Keefe Sencen/Fitz Vacker Characters: Sophie Foster (Keeper of the Lost Cities), Keefe Sencen, Fitz Vacker, Biana Vacker Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bodyguard Sophie Foster, Prince Fitz Vacker, Assassin Keefe Sencen, Celebrations, Happy Birthday Izzy!!!